It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
