After last night, I could never be a politician.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Randomize
