Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
