I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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