i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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