you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
