just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
She bit a glass in half.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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