i just had sex bonerless
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Randomize
