Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
