I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize