The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
