I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
porn star boner night. come get it.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
