just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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