i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Randomize
