Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
ok first of all what the fuck
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
