What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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