He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
