ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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