how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
