At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
She bit a glass in half.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
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