So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Randomize
