i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Is Oprah even human
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
