The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
