these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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