that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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