just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
