This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
