Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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