I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
