Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Randomize
