When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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