Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
