Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
