It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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