How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
