Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
