It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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