i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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