420 ftw
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
