hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
