you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
