did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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