Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
