are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
i out mim tonsoeep
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