If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
vagina is talking i cant
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Randomize
