she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
