First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
We got so high we made milksteak
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
