Can i not drive my cunt home
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize
