Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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