So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
